Laughter and Tears Over Tia Marias

That Fatal Mailing List #87: "St. Stephen's Day Murders" (1991)

Full disclosure: It’s a little hard for me to concentrate right now, seeing as Christmas is just a couple days away and I’m wrapping up everything I can at my day job in anticipation of 10 straight days off. 

Tonight, I’ll be riding on a rented bus with a bunch of crazy children, some of whom are my own, and drinking what’s called Santa’s Little Helper, which is egg nog and Bailey’s with some cinnamon sprinkled on top. We’ll be driving out to look at a massive lights display, literally basking in the glow of the holiday season. 

All of which makes it hard for me to relate to “St. Stephen’s Day Murders,” released in 1991 by Elvis Costello and the Chieftans for the latter’s holiday record, The Bells of Dublin. It’s one of those “Christmas songs” that’s more like a “man, Christmas is a pain in the ass” song. Those have their place! They’re lots of fun. 

But man, this is a dark satirical entry in the genre. There’s no actual murder in the song, but the threat of such is woven throughout, using gruesome detail to build a celebratory scenario of such violent delights that the observer can’t help but want to spend the day after Christmas making sure he never has to sit through another holiday party again. 

Still, there’s a twinkle in EC’s eye as he sings, and a spring in the tune thanks to the Chieftans. Costello co-wrote the song with the late, great Paddy Moloney of that legendary Irish band. You can imagine the pair of them cackling with glee as they concocted this bleak holiday tableau. The recording starts with the ominous thud of a drum, the plunk of low keys on a piano, and the rattle of a tambourine. There’s a lurch to it, but it’s unmistakably melodic, which tempers the morbidity of the story. 

Other than a few seasonal covers (his brilliant guest appearance on a Stephen Colbert holiday special, a performance of “Winter Song” from 2007) this is really the only Christmas song that EC has released. It’s a bitter pill that goes down sweet. 

And with that, I’ll wrap up year one of That Fatal Mailing List with a heartfelt thank you for your readership and your comments. I always get a spring in my step when I see a “like” or a few words from you. I feel really fortunate to have a small mighty audience that can share my everlasting obsession with the words and music of the Little Hands of Concrete. 

Enjoy every holiday you celebrate, and we’ll see you in 2023.